Friday, March 4, 2011

Grope In The Movie Theater

How to kill that monster called self-destructive jealousy

The

came to me a few months ago, fearing that his wife had had an affair. They had been problems, and she spent more time outside the house, apparently out with friends. The she did not believe for a second and has spent time stewing at home, his cell phone number and more than one occasion, cruising around to see if he could see her out and about.

Upon came home, she would be given a relentless grilling, and over time it closed it entirely. Communication has dried up, and the relationship was, it was almost over.

He looked terrible has proven exaggerated or overweight. Her skin was bad, his breath was nasty, and it displays all the classic signs of a guy who was being eaten from the inside.

And of course this despair and jealousy was not only making him sad and sick, he was driving her further and further away too! His lack of confidence in her was not only deeply offensive, but was good erodes everything they have ever had. The

Now desperately wanted out of this horrible mess and was willing to work with me to completely change his views and behavior.

I can assure you that leaving your show of jealousy is a reliable way to lose your dignity, remove your self-esteem and frankly, ruin your life! Nothing will ruin a marriage or relationship faster than jealously. It creates anxiety, anger, loneliness, hatred and fear. No one thinks clearly when they are jealous.

Having a relationship with a jealous person is not fun. Jealousy makes the person unattractive, transforming even the lover and supporter, to the enemy.

Nobody wants a partner jealous and no one likes being jealous. So how is it that many people are?

From my experience, there are a number of reasons but the main cause is the breakdown in communication, and this usually occurs for two reasons: something has changed, and for any reason, you do able to communicate openly and honestly anymore ...

Or perhaps one or both partners are manipulated their power by withholding information from anger, hurt or even light at all.

Both situations create communication "black holes" that are then easily filled with the fear of filling, fury and fantasy. Vacuums

communication open room with tons of difficult questions of jealous guy. "A she found someone she likes better than me? "Is she cheating on me? "She will leave me? "A she found someone richer, younger, funnier? "When you're

jealous, you assume the worst: "Maybe she'll fall in love with her personal trainer and leave me. "

" She goes to lunch with her boss because she has an affair with him. "

" She's not answering the phone because she is in bed with some guy in a motel! "You know how that one goes? I bet you felt pretty stupid too, when she arrived from the supermarket carrying loads of groceries, but even when you unpacked the groceries I bet you were always looking for evidence that she had been cheating!

Wow. We certainly make life difficult for ourselves sometimes.

So how do you deal with these horrible feelings of jealousy? How you deal with a spouse or boyfriend / girlfriend who is jealous?

Firstly if you are jealous, you should contact. You need to stop assuming the worst and ask questions. Open the lines again. Do not be aggressive, defensive, confrontational or spicy.

Second and equally important, you must stop looking hungry for reassurance. How on earth can they respect you if you do not respect yourself enough to control your fears and paranoia?

Third, you have to remind you why you are together in the first place and understand that a relationship is only worth keeping alive if you can trust each other. If this trust is lost forever, so maybe it is time to move forward.

Remember, jealousy is demeaning and humiliating. It is a sign of weakness and fear. Ultimately the fastest way to kill the monster has nothing to do with your partner and everything to do with you. When you have high self-esteem, jealousy has no choice but to pack his bags and leave town!


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